The Pandemic, Self-Isolation and Adultery

The pandemic, social-islolation and adultery seem to be oxymorons. I’m sure we have all heard about rise in the divorce rate in areas such as China and the U.K. in resports like this one reported by Global News Self-isolation seems to have pushed the envelope of those contemplating separation to include desired divorce papers. Those ‘sitting on the fence’ may have decided that once the veil lifts the conversations must begin.

Social isolation definintely gives way for more accountability in our actions making it more difficult to meet affair partners clandestinely. For those affair partners that insist on continuing to meet, they run the risk of bringing the unwanted virus home to their unsuspecting spouse. The New York Post reported how one cheating husband brought the virus home from Italy, after lying to his wife about a business trip. It’s likely he will survive the virus by it may cost him his marriage.

For those with affair partners who decide to keep their distance, it has created much concern with their new partners. When intimate partners are secquestered in the home with their spouse, it creates mistrust and jealousy with the new partner. Many of my own clients are facing this issue. Angry new partners are pushing for separation conversations and process starts which could prove difficult when you can’t get away from the person from which you want to separate. There is nowhere to go. Housing shifts are happening sparsely and no one wants to list the sale of their home in such an uncertain economic environment.

What’s more is that illicit activity may be traced by emergency alerts on cell phones such as in South Korea where notices are received by those who have been near a diagnosed person. Not withstanding the accuracy of technology, most people will find a way to indentify if their spouse has moments of unexplained absenses or a sudden keen interest to walk the dog. With the absence of the ability to move freely our movements become more accountable and, if warranted, suspect.

The ability to step outside of a marriage, if that is one’s motivation, is not hard to do. There is even an app for that. Gleedon is an app that is designed to help those wanting to find new already-married partners. Hiding one’s phone may lay way to secret messages or having an extra-marital app may also be dead give-away. It’s harder to hide these things consistantly when we are sharing the same space.

As we all find the effects of COVID to be widespread. And we arent’ really sure how it will impact our relationships. Who knows? Maybe some people will have that honest conversation and reconcile their differences??

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